What did you see, Alex? (probably the first of many)

In one of my favorite books, of which I have too many, the grandmother of the main character is trying to raise him to take notice of the world around himself and to try to understand it. She plagues him with this question. As he knows he will be asked at the end of each day, he plagues himself with the question, forcing himself to pay attention to the world until it becomes his nature to do so.

"What did you see, Atrus?" - Ti'ana, from Myst: The Book of Atrus

This is a good idea. Not enough people pay enough attention to the world around themselves, and even fewer pay attention to their own effect on that world. I am guilty of this myself, though I have spent many years of my life trying to improve my awareness and understanding. Trying to see.

Someday, I hope to plague my own children with this question, but for now, I can only ask it to myself. In the interests of improving my ability to see and my ability to write, I will answer that question here.

--

"What did you see, Alex?"

Last weekend, I went to Mu Ko Surin National Park near Kuraburi, Thailand. I went snorkeling, and I saw a lot of fish.

I saw two blacktip reef sharks swimming in the bay. They were rather timid and quickly fled at my approach.

I saw gobies working with burrowing shrimp to their mutual benefit; the shrimp gets a lookout over its burrow to warn of approaching danger, and the goby gets a safe place to stay and lay its eggs.

I saw a family of clownfish in an anemone. The largest of the bunch swam out to confront me when I came closer to investigate, though I'm not sure what he thought he could do to me. Perhaps he thought to divert my attention from the others. Still, he showed no fear as he got right up in my face.

I saw a large pod of dolphins, probably bottlenose, traveling past the island. There were probably about 40 animals at a guess, though it was difficult to estimate since they don't all surface at the same time. At any given time, you could see around 10 or 15 dorsal fins and backs as they breathed. Among them were some juveniles and perhaps even calfs. They were passing the island and heading north.

I saw a Titan Triggerfish that was not happy to see me, though I didn't get close enough to really bother it. During one of our snorkeling outings, I saw a fish picking at the reef in a way that looked rather familiar. As I got closer, it stopped picking at the reef and drifted upwards a bit. I finally recognized its shape as a triggerfish just as its trigger started to go up. I immediately backed off and it went back to what it was doing. I later had a much larger one swim right beneath me, but since neither I nor it was in its territory, it ignored me.

I saw many parrotfish, including a very impressive school of about 30 of them traveling along the reef bottom.

I saw many fish which I could not identify, though I intend to.

I saw the deep blue.

I saw the sunset over a gorgeous barque moored offshore just beyond the straight between the two main islands.

I saw the nebula on Orion's sword before the clouds rolled in to cover the sky.

NEEEEERRRRRRDDDDDS!!!!!!!!!

I am a nerd. I fully admit that. I am extremely proud of that. I have a very good friend, hell, she's my best friend, who actually appreciates and loves that I'm a nerd. She is progressing very well along her road to extreme nerd-dom. To wit, this chat, which began in reference to a typo:

A: I mean, 'u' and 'i' are right next to each other
(which would make an AWESOME pun, btw)
J: hahahaha
they did it on purpose you know
A: or a bad pickup line
J: very bad
hahaha
funny but
OH!
A: "Hey baby, let's be a QWERTY keyboard." "What?" "So U and I can be right next to each other forever."
*SMACK*
J: and i am between 'o' and 'u'
OMG!
that's so bad
A: hahahaha
HAHAHAHAHA
OH MY
(rofl)
J: imagine the whole thing together
baby lets be a qwerty keyboard. u and i will be together and i will be between u and o(hhhhhhhhhhh).

Errr... yeah. I think the following picture will summarize everything quite succinctly.

A beautiful sentiment

I was having a conversation with some people about the meaning of life. Someone, surprisingly more pessimistic than myself (heh), proposed that "People only exist to break others' hearts" as the opener for this discussion and it grew from there. Whether you agree or not with that statement (for the record, I whole-heartedly do not), it is difficult to deny the beauty of this sentiment, shared by a married man about his wife:

"After seriously contemplating this idea for several minutes, seriously, I disagree with your premise. There is only one person's heart, other than my own, that I have the slightest interest in: my wife of almost 15years. I go out of my way to make sure that she is as happy as humanly possible. That she will wake up in the morning knowing that she is loved and appreciated, never taken for granted. And that she will go to sleep every night with a smile on her face. I have no interest in breaking her heart. I have no interest in any other heart." - g(TF)

Wow. I don't think I have ever seen a more simple and more accurate statement of what marriage should be. Lucky guy, eh?

I have no interest in breaking her heart. I have no interest in any other heart.

Home(less)

"Home, to me, is the place where you know where everything is in the kitchen."

This occurred to me the other day as I was watching a friend pack, getting ready to move out of her place for good. I went to the store to get some food, and this thought struck me. As someone who likes to cook, it seems rather apt. It describes just how comfortable I have to feel in a place in order to call it home. Granted, I didn't live there, but the place you live isn't necessarily "home". Still, her place wasn't home, but it felt more like home to me than any dwelling I've been in for a long time, even those I've actually lived in. I knew my way around the kitchen. That's "home" enough for me.

To have that degree of comfort with a place and with the person or people living there is a wonderful thing. Even if the person living there is you and you alone.

Where I live is not home. It is a place to sleep and occasionally hide from the world, but it is not home. While I am very comfortable with the person living there, it is not home. It doesn't have a kitchen.

Right now, I am homeless.

Sandbox

A sandbox is a place to play around, build up, tear down, laugh, cry, babble, imagine, tell the truth, lie, and even eat some sand, if you feel so inclined. In a sandbox, you can say what you want, as long as there are no grown-ups around to admonish you for your foul language. You can do what you want. You can be what you want. You can ignore the reality beyond the sides of the box.

So, build a sand castle. Knock it down. Write the word "fuck" in the sand. Maybe hastily cover it up or scratch it out if the eyes of a too nosy grown-up wander a bit too close. Or not. Do what you want. It's a sandbox.

Play.

Have fun.